Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Ring, ring. 


'Hi. It's Mum!'

'Mum, I'm at school.'

'I know. I just called to ask you what you'd like for dinner.'

'Mum, I'm in the middle of a lesson.'

'Well, tell me what you'd like and I'll let you go!'

'Mum, everyone's looking at me and the teacher's glaring at me. I can't start talking about what I want for dinner now!'

'Well, all right, I'll try and think of something. Can you pick up some milk on the way home?'

'Mum, I'm going to tennis lessons after school and I'll be carrying my gear and racquet as well as my books!'

'OK. Bye!'


is it time for a nap yet? i think so

Monday, November 28, 2005

Lazy walruses caught in the act. 

Check out the time lapse photography on the webcam (scroll down) at Macquarie Island, Australian Antarctic Territory. In two hours, those walruses HAVEN'T MOVED!

is it time for a nap yet? i think so

Sunday, November 27, 2005


With over 260 kilometres of coastline and an area of over 2000 square metres, Port Phillip Bay is an extremely large body of water.

Some bright spark has decided to count the fish in it.

How? By sending scuba divers down.

Good luck.

Having said that, I'd love to do it. Imagine the conversations.

Other person at cocktail party (holding martini glass): 'What do you do?'

Me: 'I count fish.'

Other person : 'Why?'

Me (deadpan): 'To see how many there are, of course!'

Other person (nodding wisely): 'Ah, of course!'

(slight pause during which other person eats olive)

Other person: 'And how many are there?'

Me: 'Don't know. I haven't finished counting yet. They will keep moving around.'

is it time for a nap yet? i think so

Wednesday, November 23, 2005


Why is there no driftwood at the beach any more?

is it time for a nap yet? i think so

Tuesday, November 22, 2005


That's today's Word Verification Codeword of the Day.

I don't have word verification because no-one wants to spam me, but other blogs do.

I just left a comment on one and the word verification code word came up - hobqini.

Except it was all in slanty, rounded, floaty lettering. Isn't hobqini a great word? It sounds like the boss of the fairies or a stovetop cleaning device, I'm not sure which.

is it time for a nap yet? i think so

Monday, November 21, 2005

Shall we step outside for a smoke? 

Maybe not.

is it time for a nap yet? i think so

Requiem for a Horse. 

Carrying the coffin down the aisle might have been a bit difficult.

is it time for a nap yet? i think so

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Another zoo story: boy jumps fence and gets a scratch from a leopard; mother calls for leopard 'not to be put down'. 

Can you believe that?

A nine-year-old boy who should have more sense, jumps a fence, runs over to a leopard's cage, leans against it and gets scratched, YET THE STUPID KID'S MOTHER PATRONISINGLY SAYS THE LEOPARD SHOULD BE SPARED?

More stupid stuff in the story: the kid's fellow students (he was on a school excursion) were to be offered 'counselling' BOTH at the zoo and after they returned to school.

Not everyone in the story is a complete screwball - the Zoo director said safety procedures would be reviewed but the investigation would focus on supervision of school groups rather than safety barriers.


Did you get the zoo director's name?

Mr Gibbons.

is it time for a nap yet? i think so

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Harriet the tortoise turns 175; celebrates with pink hibiscus flower cake. 

Well, approximately 175. After all, a woman never reveals her age.

is it time for a nap yet? i think so

Monday, November 14, 2005

Well, block my pop-up and edit my posts! 

The language sure and all is changing.

Time was when close a window meant it was cold outside so you got up and slammed down the glass and timber sash.

Now it's what you do when you want to make an information box disappear from a computer screen.

is it time for a nap yet? i think so

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Someone made poetry out of spam, so why not spam made out of poetry? 

Blow, blow, thou winter wind,
Thou art not so unkind dear Mistah Nelson
As man's ingratitude and lack of hard erection;
Thy tooth is not so keen

Outside the sky is light with stars;
Get 26% discount when you buy software
There's a hollow roaring from the sea.
And, alas! no crysalis online pharmaceutical for the little almond flowers,
The wind is shaking the almond tree and videos only of your most private moments.

The sea is calm to-night but later you can see anything your heart desires.
The tide is full, the moon lies fair Re: employmentqz332ppkhhnbbnh98.
Upon the straits; on the French coast the light
Gleams and is gone; the cliffs of England stand to gain 56% in the size of your member.

How do I love thee, jazini@adroit.newcome3.IT.IN? Let me count the ways direct to your desktop from the office of the master of the prize draw for one billion US dollars guaranteed! if you subscribe! today!
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height, Mr Ursus B. Genralia
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace and special DVDs of nothing you have ever seen before

Oh! young Lochinvar is come out of the west,
Through all the wide Border his steed was the best with NEW SOFTWARE OPPORTUNITY
And save his good broadsword he weapons had none, except VERY CHEAP, EASY AND CONVENIENT WAY TO MAKE THOUSANDS QUICKLY!
He rode all unarmed and he rode all alone. BUT NOT FOR LONG!

Breathes there the man, with soul so dead,
Who never to himself hath said,
This is my own, my native land!
Whose heart hath ne'er within him burn'd, NEED EXTRA CASH?

Without warning
as a whirlwind
swoops on an oak
Need LOVE pi11s NOW
Love shakes my heart

All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players,
They have their exits and entrances AND ALL SPECIAL TITLES ARE YOURS
And one man in his time plays many parts,

is it time for a nap yet? i think so

Monday, November 07, 2005


Last night I dreamt I woke up at three in the morning. I climbed out of bed and came out to the living room. It was the size of a palace ballroom. All the lights were on and there were a dozen or so people there, children and adults.

'Excuse ME!' I shouted.

They all looked at me.

'Go to bed NOW! The lot of you!'

And looking directly at the adults, I said 'You adults should know BETTER!'

Then I turned around, slammed the door and went back to bed.

I hate my sleep being interrupted. Even in a dream.

is it time for a nap yet? i think so

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

+ + 

I'm a little tired.

And I've suddenly developed a weird fascination with symbols.


This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?